Two items of background information are necessary to fully appreciate this story.
First, we've been in a losing battle with a raccoon (or perhaps a family of them) for a few months now. They get in our garage and knock over the trash can or steal our cat's food. Poor Autumn. She's learned to eat just as soon as we put the food down because she knows better than to fight the hungry, masked fiends.
Secondly, if we so much as whisper after putting HRH to bed, we hear about it. Her sense of hearing is fine tuned and I swear, she hears the cat snoring and takes that as her cue to holler out, "Mommy? Daddy?" We usually just go downstairs so we can enjoy luxuries like breathing without the constant need to firmly (but oh, so lovingly) shout back, "Go to sleep, Reagan!"
So last night, we tucked our angel into bed with lots of hugs and kisses and hushed good nights. I went out to check on Autumn. Danny was in the office.
When I got into the garage, Autumn was not alone. A gigantic (and I mean HUGE) raccoon was feasting on her supper! I didn't see him at first but I could hear him crunching and smacking. (Did I mention we feed our cats Science Diet? We never had a raccoon problem when we bought them the cheap Wal-Mart brand). I opened the little kitty door to reveal the beast in all his furry glory. Then I screamed and screamed and screamed some more. The raccoon was trapped and couldn't get out because I was blocking his exit. I couldn't move because in my hysteria, I thought he was a badger and I knew I was about to die. Autumn blew herself up as big as she could and then hopped onto my car for safety.
Danny heard the commotion and came running with a broom. I jumped behind him. I was inside the laundry room hitting the button for the garage door to open while Danny was in the garage hitting the button for the garage door to open...thus the door hiccuped up and down and up and down and finally I shouted, "We're working against each other, you fool! Don't touch the button!" I managed to get the garage door open and the raccoon wandered, slowly, calmly out the kitty door to the side. He barely glanced in our direction. Meanwhile, Psalms was inside the house racing to and fro and meowing at the top of her lungs.
Danny and I collapsed in each other's arms after shutting all the doors. We were both panting and laughing nervously.
And...guess who slept through the whole episode?!
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4 comments:
That reminds Daddy and me of two little girls who slept through the rat visitor in the house and our raccoon mother and baby in our garage long, long ago!!! I was laughing uncontrollably at my desk reading your espisode. Love you!! Mama
I was thinking the same thing. When you were jumping on the counter and Lisa and I slept through the entire fiasco.
OH my gosh...how funny! Of course she'd sleep through it, but dare to WHISPER downstairs and she'd hear it. ;)
I thought of your story about the rat visitor, too. For the record, Danny was NOT in a bathrobe with hairy legs sticking out below!
And...last night Danny STAPLED a stack of papers in the office and Reagan hollered out, "Daddy, ok?" And we said, "Yes, Reagan we're fine. Now. Go.To.Sleep."
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